I Shamelessly Self-promoted My Book For The Holidays. Here's How It Went.

To quote fictional capitalist mastermind Don Draper: "The astir important thought successful advertizing is 'new.'" And, arsenic nan picnic play began, I worried that my debut memoir, Theatre Kids, which had recreation retired June 18th, was becoming nan different of new.

So I needed point "new" to flog connected social.

I had been moving connected a 2nd book relationship (a postulation of fun/dumb connection to dudes) but I wanted to find a measurement to observe my book for Christmas, and perchance discarded a less copies because I deliberation it's a bully read. Publisher's Weekly called it "wry and boisterous." The New York Post described it arsenic "moving." I image it arsenic an uncomfortably individual memoir astir weirdoes and play queens navigating grief, friendship, and inexpensive cocaine.

It's worthy nan money. I ne'er imagined I'd beryllium nan benignant of personification to deliberation that way. I'm an creator aft all.

But I personification bills to pay.

What's nan Big Idea?

I personification learned a awesome woody astir nan waste and acquisition and business of penning complete nan past less years, but, first and foremost, I learned that astatine nan opening of this project, I was a literate genius. And now, six months aliases truthful aft having been published for nan first time, I americium simply a book salesperson.

I emotion writing. But, for now, I americium here, connected outer Earth, pinch a singular mission. I americium coming to discarded books and chew bubble gum and I americium each retired of bubble gum.

And past it deed me: what I needed was a bully ol' fashioned trading gimmick. A stunt. A mini razzle-dazzle. I needed a caller message. Instead of "Hey net attraction to this aged thing," I needed to outcry "Hey, net attraction to this new thing."

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So I impulsively posted a video crossed each my platforms declaring that I was going to publication nan entirety of Theatre Kids' successful 1 sitting, 1 agelong marathon performance. I would do it astatine an experimental theatre abstraction dense successful Brooklyn called Crawlspace. It's friends and warm. Speakeasy-ish. Imagine if Stanley Kubrick designed a activity dungeon; that's nan vibe. Once I posted that was that.

I began to get tense successful nan days earlier nan reference and considered lying astir catching a tummy bug, which is nan original "Get Out Of Jail" card. But instead, I emailed and posted and emailed again. "Come to my reading," I barked, crossed platforms.

7 1/2 Hours successful Heaven and Hell

It's important to cognize what your goals are successful each things. My superior extremity pinch this task was to discarded books by inspiring a caller reside connected societal media. So, I didn't title tickets. Admission was impervious of purchase: hardcover, Kindle, aliases nan fantabulous audiobook from Audible publication by Brian Holden. I didn't expect anyone to recreation for nan afloat constituent — I made it a constituent successful emails and posts to mention this.

Here's an illustration of nan transcript I used: "Show up whenever. Don't beryllium acrophobic to barge successful aliases loudly sigh and ample upwind out. Bring friends! Laugh and constituent astatine nan funny man reference his book of feelings! This is casual: plaything by for a less minutes aliases 2 hours. Stay for nan afloat thing! Sadly, I will not beryllium signing books because I will beryllium connected stage, suffering for MY ART.

I started reference my memoir astatine 1:15 PM connected December 14th and vanished astatine 8:45 PM. 216 pages. 70 1000 words. I took 2 fifteen-minute breaks to usage nan restroom, chug Red Bulls, and snack connected popcorn. For 7½ hours, I sat successful a folding chair astatine a mini array successful a dimly lit basement micro-theater located successful 1 of nan astir inconvenient-to-get-to corners of Bed-Stuy. The abstraction was still littered pinch group pieces from nan erstwhile night's workshop: a accumulation of an accommodation of a beloved French caller astir creepy twins.

I think, successful all, 20 aliases 30 group cycled through. The evening ended pinch conscionable 3 maniacs—dead-enders who endured hours and hours of my overshare-y memoir. When I vanished nan past line, they cheered, and I astir fell retired of my chair.

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Aftermath

The greeting after, I felt hungover. My assemblage ached arsenic if I'd exerted myself physically—which I hadn't, really. No, I mostly sat, hunched complete my book, reference retired loud, which, aft nan first hr aliases so, turned into a benignant of belief chanting, for illustration I was a primitive beatified man hallucinating connected mushrooms. I mislaid each consciousness of clip astatine 1 point. During nan 2nd break, I confided to a friend, a beingness therapist, that I had denotation successful my small backmost and sides and she laughed because nan trial was obvious.

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My affectional recreation came successful 3 parts: I regretted nan marathon reference almost immediately. Then, I became euphoric, for illustration an unprepared mountaineer suffering from hypoxia during their ascent. As I approached nan past 50 pages, my mind returned to regret. My pharynx was raw. I could consciousness my ribcage. I also, oddly, didn't want it to end? But it ended, and I went to a Christmas connection and I deliberation I talked to a less 12 people, including 1 caput whose activity I respect who told maine she had fixed a transcript of 'Theatre Kids' to a young student. That made maine smile. But, mostly, I emotionally ate each nan salty meats from nan host's charcuterie expanse and past floated location alongside my wife, who supported each measurement of my capacity art/public self-flagellation.

Here are immoderate things I learned:

• If I were overmuch successful, I could walk shame. But I can't. So I shamelessly promoted nan reference and my book online constantly: Instagram, Facebook, Twitter/X, Threads, Bluesky, Linkedin. Sheesh, yes, moreover LinkedIn.
• Reading your book retired loud, whether it's successful a workplace aliases successful a theatre for a trading stunt, is humbling and frustrating. If you're a perfectionist, you will study that your book is not perfect. I recovered typos! And repetitive words! There were lines and paragraphs that should personification been cut! No 1 noticed these things but me!
• One personification caught a existent error: James Lapine was nan director, not nan lyricist, of Sondheim's Into nan Woods. My god. Mea culpa.
• I should personification hired a maestro photographer or, astatine least, a friend who is very bully astatine societal photos and pics. Ah, well. Next time.
• I wasn't wearing my glasses, truthful I couldn't spot who was there. If you were and we haven't talked, please opportunity hi. I want to convey you.
• Throwing an event/reading/launch/work of capacity art? Buy donuts! Everyone loves donuts.
• How did I talk non-stop for almost 7 hours? VOCAL WARM-UPS. And, honestly, a gallon aliases truthful of h2o and a half-dozen cans of seltzer. I kept my instrumentality MOIST.
• There has sewage to beryllium an easier measurement to beforehand income of my book. There astir apt are, but I did not return 1 of those ways.

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Writing a book is difficult, but publishing 1 and trading it is conscionable arsenic challenging. This process has taught maine to defy confusing integrity pinch insecurity. I learned to discarded my work. I learned that each clip I heard a mini sound say, "You're promoting excessively much," I should instantly beforehand my book. These platforms are of decreasing utility, mostly existing to extract attraction by stirring earthy and unhappy emotions, but they tin still discarded shit. I dream you'll spot buying my shit—for yourself aliases for personification you emotion who suffers from Theatre Kid Syndrome (TKS). You tin find nan typos together! And that 1 condemnation I repeat!